You've probably read a lot of people’s stories online, tales of how they were bullied in school or still are, because of their weight issues, or how they never feel content with themselves, which left them vulnerable to severe confidence issues. Here is mine.
It was back when I was in the 4th grade, that this entire notion of body shaming started. Even though I was just slightly healthier than my skinny classmates, the phrase "You're so fat" and the frequent name-calling, led to a level of self-consciousness that no person should ensure at such an age. After a long struggle of starving myself, and looking in the mirror wistfully hoping to shrink in size, I finally lost weight by the 8th grade. Funnily enough however, the girls who once tormented me are the ones who now put ‘all lives matter’ and ‘love yourself’ stories on Instagram. Ironically, now that I have lost weight, I’ve had some people be like ‘why don’t you gain some weight?’. But I have now realized, it’s my body, my shape. I’ll lose or gain as and when I feel like. Other people’s comments just tell about how wrong their upbringing was that they can’t see an individual happy with their own body shape. To add insult to injury, some of them are even pursuing psychology.
The basic problem in the society that we live in, is the fact that we don’t educate our kids. We don’t filter the thoughts of children who are in kindergarten. We don’t teach them enough about compassion. The girls who once teased me in school have now matured, but wouldn’t it have been better if they were taught about how they were shattering other people’s confidence and giving them insecurities to deal with from a much younger age?
The world is changing and becoming more acceptable. But our focus should be on nipping the evil in the bud. I personally lost weight and am now in a body shape that I'm content and comfortable with right now. But it’s the incentive that matters. Stopping those girls from body shaming me was the main reason that I stressed about losing weight and it wasn't because I had any health issues. I wasn’t even fat or obese technically, I was more on the healthier side compared to my skinny classmates. Let's change the focus and think about all those people who have tried those bizarre, unhealthy diets and hit the gym, tried finding some solace with yoga and are still having trouble controlling their weight, which often is even hormonal, like PCOD. I have seen so many of my friends with PCOD trying to spread awareness about this issue, how gaining weight is not their fault and how they now love who they are and have accepted themselves.
But had body shaming not existed at all, do you think all this was even required? Like most social issues, it all stems down to the culture of what was taught when we were young, and how we were brought up. If someone were to tell us that doing something is wrong, perhaps there existed an alternate timeline, where we wouldn't be as obtuse to the social issues around us.
However, as the saying goes ‘ It's better late than never’. Encourage your kids or siblings to speak up. If someone bullies them, they shouldn't be afraid to call them out, or alert the authorities. It's time we rebuild the system, to one where such actions are not ignored, but nipped in the bud. It isn't cool to be body shamed.
There can be some changes seen in the world already. Many fashion brands are now catering their trends in clothes for plus sized and super skinny people as well. Even the modelling industry is slowly accepting different body shapes and promoting the same. But there’s still quite a long way to go. Remember that there exists a difference between a person trying to lose weight as a result of being body shamed, and a person doing it for themselves, to feel healthier.
This isn’t a barbie world and you needn't be confirmed to body types that were once set as the standard for perfection. Learn to develop that beauty in your heart instead. Speak up for yourself and others when you feel that something isn't right albeit any aspect: body, features or even if you feel people’s approach towards you is not right.
Take an example of Winnie Harlow who is such an amazing inspiration all over the world, if vitiligo didn’t stop her from becoming a successful fashion model then I feel with enough confidence nothing can stop you either!
In the words of Kelly Clarkson- “I love my body. I’m very much OK with it. I don’t think artists are ever the ones who have the problem with their weight, it is other people.”
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