As children, we grew up following roles designated by the society. Gender norms were assigned to us without us even realising it. Gender norms are basically social principles used to supervise the female and male populations and confine their identities to what is considered appropriate and suitable for society. These have been passed down for generations and generations and will still continue to be passed on. Gender norms include a vast variety of different standards which range from the most obvious and blasphemous ones to minute and simple things that may go unnoticed but still do have enormous impacts. These stereotypes extend to personality traits, occupations, domestic behaviours, physical appearance, etc. We are going to take a look at different takes on gender norms pursued by us.
A classic example would be assigning the colour pink for girls and blue for boys. This starts even before the birth of a child. Gender reveal is a popular trend these days where the parents reveal the sex of the baby by using these colours. Even before the child is born, we label the innocent children with different shades of the rainbow. And once the child is actually born, the hospital wraps them in pink or blue towels to differentiate the genders. This inflates in many ways, many ugly ways and somehow, we still follow it. The sad part is, since women are already shunned, most women are ashamed of the colour of pink as it marked by meekness and femininity. Pink is seen as soft-natured and weak. Even boys who like the colour, refrain from admitting it as it would label them as feeble, feminine beings. Another way gender norms are projected on us would be through toys. Funny how girls are always introduced to stuffy animals and dolls while boys are given mechanical toys like cars and trucks. Adults immediately assume that girls would prefer barbies over action figures and vice versa for boys. This is one of the many ways girls are indirectly labelled to be soft-natured and taught to cater to the needs of others and always be groomed to look appealing. Isn’t that the main concept of dolls, to dress them up and take good care? While boys play with cars and trucks, they are coached to be athletic and aggressive. When they grow into teenagers and adults, boys are encouraged to choose competitive fields like sports and engineering whereas departments like the nursing field were expected by girls to take up. STEM subjects are more of a boys’ club whereas girls have to stick with creative pursuits. It is ridiculous how girls are expected to be well behaved and mannered. They have to appear pleasing and attractive and always adopt graceful and refined qualities. Boys, however, are brought up to be rough and tough. They have to be aggressive and act out in order to prove their manliness and masculinity. Otherwise, they are labelled as feminine. There is nothing wrong in women being soft natured and men being a little tough. But to label these genders with such contrasting adjectives is preposterous. Women are bold and zealous and men are compassionate and gentle. All these attributes and personalities apply equally to all genders. Physical appearance has an immense role to play in gender stereotypes. Men are often conceived to look muscular and tall. Women have to be thin and petite. They should possess lithe and lightly curvy bodies. Hairy men are deemed attractive but women should have to be spotless and hairless. Soft and supple skin for women, ragged, rough bodies for men. Again, nothing wrong in women having clear bodies and men going for toned ones. The opposite should be equally respected and welcomed by society. Hair on body and skin is natural. If a woman wishes to let her hair on her body grow out, that should be acceptable. Likewise, if a man desires smooth skin and a hairless body, he should be able to go for it without being shamed. Unfair and unattainable body standards have to be broken as well. Women of all sizes and shapes are worthy of celebration and praise and beauty. Men of all dimensions are attractive enough and should feel proud of their bodies. Lack or abundance on muscles on both genders should be normalised. A healthy body should be encouraged, instead of unnatural body goals. Isn’t it quite unfair how even one’s dress sense is heavily scrutinised and critiqued based on gender? Skirts are for girls and pants are for boys. Balletic and elegant dresses adorn by women are revered and respected. Men in strong suits of neutral tones are admired. A man in a skirt is deemed queer or gay. A woman in a shirt and trousers is defined manly. How is baldness and short hair on a girl unattractive? How do men who proudly wear jewellery and high heeled shoes and skirts look ladylike? Every article of clothing is classified specifically for women and men to wear. Every piece of jewellery, accessory and footwear is categorised for both the genders and anyone who breaks this barrier, is ridiculed and shamed. It is rather infuriating to know that dress codes have prejudiced rules in all aspects. In sports, in schools, in a professional workspace, in literally every field of work, absurd dress codes are forced upon men and women, and sometimes these rules don’t even cater to the convenience and comfort of the individual, man or woman. One who shatters these rules, is punished unfairly.
Personality traits and behaviours also play a major role in gender norms. Assertiveness and firmness are expected from a man. Displays of emotion and feelings are considered unmanly and labels such as queer are unfairly given to men who do so. Men have to exhibit masculine qualities and should be driven to be breadwinners for the family. Nurturing attributes and domestic responsibilities are not wonted off from a man. Girls are given household duties and are depended upon to birth children and raise them. Education is not their utmost priority and they are brought up to be submissive and obedient. Women are expected to be soft natured and compliant. A woman with an emphatic and aggressive attitude is considered ‘bitchy’ or ‘bossy’. And when girls express their emotions profoundly, they are dismissed as hormonal. Gender norms and roles affect how we speak, act, behave, dress and groom ourselves. It is in our way of life, it latches on our mannerisms like leeches. Even without knowing, we tend to exhibit prejudiced qualities and exercise gender roles on a daily basis. Gender roles and gender norms will take time an effort to completely get rid off. It takes combined endeavour and spirit to look at the world in an unbiased way and work towards a more fair society. Let us strive for a hopeful and better future.
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