June, the month of pride saw a different fate this year. While the whole world was supposed to be battling a pandemic, we chose a much bigger and pertinent war, of “racism” and violence against minorities. The roar was loud and clear across continents. Systematic discrimination and oppression must end. Discrimination that is patterned across institution and is based on sex, colour, religion, race, political or social opinion must end. The solution to this requires support from the privileged, real active support. But with confusing power dynamics alongside different demographics of every marginalised or minority community, it is often difficult to navigate the correct path. Across all alliances, what must remain constant, is how to unite as one. And thus, here are some often side-lined principles of being an ally.
Being an ally today means, being someone who is not a member of a particularly marginalised group, seeks to find measures to prevent, and consequently acts on them to end the existence of injustice and oppression. The word has come to imply more than just empathy, it has brought forth a tangent to the cause and action to understanding.
To be an ally is neither an achievement nor an accomplishment. It’s not a gold star to flaunt. It’s a process of continued evolution to better understand your privilege and use it to do good, and not do harm. It’s often harder to do this than we think. It involves accepting that our comfortable notions are perhaps not all that harmless. It also means participating in demolishing systematic discrimination, with whatever depth of understanding we acquire. To conceptualise this idea, think that you carry an equal weight as that of a marginalised individual, and thus cannot get rid of it at your convenience, rather you carry it till the end of this change. As a characteristic of the privilege, it often will be limited to a badge of glory. Thus, as a true ally, we must remember to first and foremost, put the cause above and before ourselves and our victory.
Allyship is an important part of the solution, chosen by the oppressed (and not the other way round). This advocates for everyone to have the potential of being an ally. It recognises and strengthens the basis of allegations against the majority privileged as it involves the element of acceptance of the wrongs that have been done. It contrasts the under-privileged with the privileged, while keeping them on the same side of advocacy. Our civilisation is inherently run by the majority domination, and this elemental acceptance of 'what is wrong' gives humanity a more significant meaning. Allyship is hence, a process, to balances the differences in power of privileges.
So, the big question stands, what should an ally do? The most important answer here, amidst many things, is: do not wait upon someone to show you as to how you could be more of an ally. That’s an unfair burden to put on the oppressed. Rather, utilise tools like listening and education as the best ways to get involved. Communicate more, have better interactions and meaningful conversations, wherein you do not impose or assume. Read, watch and re-evaluate yourself via art that conveys the struggles of suppressed communities in a unified language. As mentioned earlier, learning is not enough, you need to bring forth all you know to all that you understand. Do this by owning up any act of discrimination you were involved in, apologise and thank the oppressed in helping you realise better. Do not remain silent if anyone says something hurtful and unaligned to the cause, however do not be the aggressor or use your privilege to explain your opinions. Seek permission to actively intervene.
All your efforts can come to standstill, if you do not re-learn from your mistakes. You will find yourself centring, derailing and denying experiences and conversations, and you will get called out for it. Do not lash out or defensively argue to prove yourself correct. Accept, re-evaluate and re-learn. Give yourself a second chance. But remember while you make mistakes, you are harming people. This realisation must be constant incentive for you to be cautious.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others "
~Marrianne Williamson
The idea here is simple, being proactive realisers now, will inherently make this a natural realisation in our near future. Just as systematic discrimination was installed into us and our institutions, piece by piece, we must uninstall it from our civilisation the same way in order to eradicate the mentions of such horrid acts of suppression.
The way you are isn’t wrong or unnatural.
You are all unique creations meant to be embraced and everyone deserves to feel this way.
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